Are You Green-lighting or Stopping an Important Work Relationship?

by Judith E. Glaser

The consequences of your interactions are filed daily in your memory bank, either as “feel good” or “feel bad” experiences. Memories with strong emotions linger, since the brain more easily files and calls up memories attached with strong sensory data. Smells, tastes, and emotions attached to a memory give it distinctions that enable you to call it up more easily. With little provocation, we can instantly call up a bad experience.

Haven’t you ever had a bad experience with a boss? If you’re really upset, you’ll talk about it forever. Emotional trauma or experiences that threaten our ego, well-being and self-esteem, or just push our hot buttons, tend to linger and create toxic effects that, over time, become the stories everyone wants to tell.

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Ouch! Why Those Precious Few Engaged Workers Leave

​The latest Gallup poll ​ (October 2013)​ on the State of the Global workplace show​s only 13%TiredBusinessFolks.Ambro of the ​worldwide ​workforce is engaged.​ (The U.S. and Canada has the highest number of engaged workers: 29%.)​  ​

​” The bulk of employees worldwide — 63% — are “not engaged,” meaning they lack motivation and are less likely to invest discretionary effort in organizational goals or outcomes. And 24% are “actively disengaged,” indicating they are unhappy and unproductive at work and liable to spread negativity to coworkers. ” Gallup

Gallup says this dis-engagement has slowed economic growth worldwide and contributed to social unrest. If that’s not a clarion call for organizations to get to the root of employee dis-engagement, what is?  And, Daniel Pink, author of  ​Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us ​, says it’s not about the external stuff: money and promotions. It’s about our need to  learn, create, achieve mastery and make a difference.

​We can’t do that without respect for who we are and the talents we bring to the workplace.​

If you don’t want to lose your best and brightest, here are a couple of video trainings that are beautifully produced and will sensitize your workforce to the everyday slights that chip away at self-esteem and respect:

  • Anyone Can be an Ally:  Used by AT&T, Merck, Citigroup, Bank of America, Hewlett-Packard, DuPont, the NSA, and many other corporations, government agencies, and hundreds of colleges and universities.
  • Ouch! Your Silence Hurts: Speak up to make a difference when colleagues are disrespected.  Wouldn’t you want someone to speak up for you?

Image courtesy of Ambro / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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Is the Fear of Conflict Shutting Down Your Ability to Communicate?

By Judith E. Glaser

Confrontation is something we tend to avoid. It’s our least developed skill; the ability to confront each other face to face, say what is in our hearts and minds, and at the same time build and strengthen our relationships.

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What Many of Us Think Conflict Looks Like

Having difficult conversations scares most people into thinking they will lose a friendship, and so they avoid the truth. When we feel frustrated or angry at someone who we feel has undermined us, we get so upset we just can’t find the words to express ourselves. We end up pushing, not pulling, expressing our worst behaviors, or we may hold it all inside until we boil up and explode.

We now know from Conversational Intelligence research we’ve conducted for the past 5 years, that conflict or even “fear of conflict” causes our brains to produce higher levels of cortisol (the fear hormone) and cortisol is like a red-light to our brains; it closes down the part of our brain where language resides (the prefrontal cortex) and we lose our ability to express ourselves clearly or accurately.  Continue reading

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Build Your Own Video Training Library

It really is that easy. We’ve just added hundreds of new training videos and short video case-studies for trainers and educators to use to teach leadership skills, change management, HR skills, harassment  and more. Do you want to stream a video on your Learning Management System (LMS)? Do you need a video for your next PowerPoint presentation? Need a video file?

Online training videos

Here are a couple of examples of newly added videos:

*Ben & Jerry, Social Conscience and a Sense of Humor in Business.  A case-study on innovation with the creators of that wonderful chunky ice-cream. They made their business fit their values of community involvement, empowering employees and protecting the environment.

* Do It Right! with Lou Holtz, former Notre Dame football coach. This best-selling program is the perfect vehicle to instill the spirit of teamwork, commitment to excellence, loyalty to the organization, and personal dedication to success.

*The Uh-Oh Syndrome: from Intolerance to Inclusion Dr. Steve Robbins explains that while certain cultural and neurobiological forces compel us to be closed-minded towards anything new or different, we have it in our power to overcome these influences so that we can comfortably entertain new ideas and be more accepting of those who differ from us.

Create your own video training library. Save more with bundles of 5 videos or more. Just click on a video to preview it. You can purchase online or call (888) 380-5491 and we can curate videos , send you video previews and make recommendations based on your learning needs.

 

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Harness the Wisdom of Your Five Brains

By Judith E. Glaser

Have you ever found yourself in a situation like this: You are trying to navigate through a business meeting. You want to be helpful. It’s confusing to keep track of what’s going on. When you hear an idea you like, or see an opening to something new, you jump in and share it at the moment it occurs to you. Then someone closes that door and says, “that’s a stupid idea—we’ve tried that before and it failed.”Woman.Generations.Races.franky242

When you hear the words “stupid” and “failed”, you have an emotional reaction to the situation and person. You tune out of the meeting and ruminate. On the outside, people think you are still there. Your body is present, and your face may show signs of listening, yet a big part of you has left the meeting.

Your attention is now turned inside to your silent conversation with yourself about being stupid, and failing. You remember other times when your boss or colleague said you were stupid. You get angry and find yourself in a movie clip of you and your boss yelling about something. You are getting emotional and feeling bad about yourself. You recall a conversation you had with Jason, one of your teammates in the room; you faced-off with Jason and lost.

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The Danger of Mirrortocracy in Silicon Valley and Beyond

by Helen Whelan

“We’ve created a make-believe cult of objective meritocracy, a pseudo-scientific mythos to obscure and reinforce the belief that only people who look and talk like us are worth noticing. After making such a show of burning down the bad old rules of business, the new ones we’ve created seem pretty similar.” Carlos Bueno, programmer

Carlos Bueno wrote  “The next thing Silicon Valley needs to disrupt bigtime: its own culture , which takes aim at the hiring practices of Silicon Valley firms.  Ironically, these firms claim to have a talent shortage. The caveat should be a talent shortage of white young men, followed by young Asian men. Bueno says often these folks don’t even realize they’re hiring based on a bias. Instead, they actually think they’re being smart and objective.

Take Google. It recently announced the makeup of its workforce. The numbers tell it all. Google says it’s being transparent. That’s great but what do these companies do to create a workforce that mirrors their customers? That mines the brains and hearts of women, minorities, of all different ages?

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This isn’t new. It’s just more stark with Silicon Valley companies because they’re in the limelight and they claim to be objective data decision-makers. If we’re not careful, we all can be accused of hiring people just like ourselves. This goes all the way up the food chain to the executive suite and who we listen to and bring into our confidence.  Executive coach Marshall Goldsmith calls it “Avoiding favoritism” and how powerful people can surround themselves with “Yes Wo/men”.  Most people will deny they’re doing this but Goldsmith provides a great way to  test yourself on whether you’re doing it. 

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Customer Service Social Media Ratings and Business Performance

by Helen Whelan

I recently went online to book a vacation in San Francisco. The first thing I did was look at the reviews.   I might have liked the pictures or even the neighborhood but I wasn’t going to trust my gut alone. I wanted to see the reviews. The more reviews that were positive, the more I’d trust my purchasing decision.

I’m not doing anything different from any other consumer that is deciding where to dine, what appliance or car to buy or, basically, where to spend their money. Reviews take a lot of the risk out of the equation. Wouldn’t you rather stay somewhere that has 4 or 5 stars than a 1 star?

Social Media Reviews and Business Performance

Who needs the most customer service help?

So, what impact does shoddy customer service have on a business?  Seems the answer is quantifiable. In fact, Cornell, recently did a study of The Impact of Social Media on Lodging Performance:

First, the percentage of consumers consulting reviews at TripAdvisor prior to booking a hotel room has steadily increased over time, as has the number of reviews they are reading prior to making their hotel choice. Second, transactional data from Travelocity illustrate that if a hotel increases its review scores by 1 point on a 5-point scale (e.g., from 3.3 to 4.3), the hotel can increase its price by 11.2 percent and still maintain the same occupancy or market share.

So, all that effort to train employees and build positive attitude — is it worth it?  Think hospitality, service, retail, health care, you name it! If it can be bought and people can chat, text, take pictures/videos and review it, training in customer service makes a big difference.  What’s the alternative?

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Having Courage in Career-Defining Moments

by Sandra Ford Walston

Every obstacle you face at work represents a potential career-defining moment. Your character may be tested. You can choose to step up to the next rung on the ladder or,courage when facing workplace obstacles
lacking sufficient courage, slip back down. By simply recognizing these workplace obstacles as defining moments (things like failing to get an overdue promotion, or enduring verbal intimidation) you begin to rely on your personal, courage-based assets.

Unfortunately, many people miss the opportunity of overcoming workplace obstacles by responding consciously or unconsciously with self-defeat. They may perceive these potentially defining moments as just “part of the job,” or they may feel that in some way they deserve unfair treatment. If they take on the role of martyr or victim in order to “keep the peace,” their true heart-and-spirit Self is further stifled.

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The Power of Language to Shape the Workplace

Conversational Intelligence + The Neuroscience of Conversations

For the past 20 years, new discoveries at neuroscience research centers have been revealing new and healthy ways to handle negative emotions. Since conventional wisdom suggests that it’s better to not to discuss these emotions, we turn to alternative strategies—such as suppressing negative emotions, controlling them, managing them or sharing inappropriately (gossip/triangulation) just to get them out. Anger Management programs abound, as do Emotional Intelligence exercises to take control of those negative unsocial emotions.Power of Language to Reshape Workplace

However, our new insights and wisdom from the world of Conversational Intelligence, takes us down another path. Rather than suppressing emotions (damaging internal healthy functioning), we need to express them in healthy ways. Learning how to label emotions constructively has a big impact emotionally—both for the speaker and the listener.

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Emotions – Navigating Pleasure or Pain in the Workplace

by Judith E. Glaser

Truth Be Told—About Our Brains and Relationships

The Creating WE Institute has discovered that we have two types of reactions in Emotions - Navigating Pleasure or Pain in the Workplaceconversations—one causes us pleasure – and opens our brain, and one causes us pain and closes our brain. Appreciation is pleasure and opens the brain; negative judgment is pain and closes the brain. That’s according to our 3 decades of research with organizations of all sizes.

So, which message are you sending:“You can trust me to have your best interest at heart” or “I want to persuade you to think about things my way?”  Think of how you can create the conversational space that affords deeper understanding and engagement rather than fear and avoidance. Be mindful of your conversations and their emotional content—either pain or pleasure.

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